There is a two word sentence in a Wendell Berry poem. Practice resurrection. I love the whole poem, but these two gems put side by side are so pregnant with poignant meaning, especially after a year that has been so disruptive on a global scale. And we find ourselves rounding up on the anniversary of when the pandemic appeared in the US, right in the middle of the Lenten season.
There are things that I need that I am not even aware of. There are invitations being given consistently, but if I am not in a receptive posture, I don’t even notice. There are times when I am practicing resurrection without calling it that. It isn’t until I pause and listen that I become aware of what my life is saying to me.
My invitation came three times this year (2021 - we’re in the third month). I sat down to put some structure to the year on the first day. I laid my goals down on paper. Career, financial, spiritual, creative, physical, every heading I could think of. I thought about my health and wellness. I made some goals there. I thought about my alcohol consumption during 2020 and even the last 3 years. Admittedly, I noticed an increase during 2020. I found comfort in a glass of wine toward the end of the day more often than not. It got a short pause. I skipped over it because I didn’t have the mental energy to really look at it, which was my first no to the invitation. Then Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent came along and I paused again around the question of alcohol consumption. Just a short pause. Nope. Too much going on to put energy into that right now. About the end of January, a dear friend of mine let me know of a monthly book discussion group she put together. She let me know some of the titles that would be discussed and the gathering and events around them (all virtual for now) and I was intrigued and felt a yes and immediately dug in. Well the third invitation made its way without me even realizing what had happened. The book for this month is called The Alcohol Experiment: 30 days to take control, cut down or give up for good. It is a kind, non-judgmental look at our attitudes and beliefs around drinking. She challenges the reader to go AF (alcohol free) for 30 days and observe the self during that time and then make adjustments from there. I’m on day 12.
Meanwhile, toward the end of last year, I began practicing the Ignatian Examen daily. This is a practice that I have known about for years and had implemented here and there, but not consistently. It is the process of observing the day, noticing and looking for the movements of God in it. One becomes aware of the rise and fall of emotions during the day to indicate what seems important. It was during this prayer of Examen that I even noticed these invitations that came three different times over the span of 2 months. I wouldn’t have even made those connections without these two events, the Examen prayer and the book group, happening in my life. I have been practicing resurrection without knowing I was.
What things in your life are giving you goodness? What are ways you can practice resurrection? In what ways are you caring for yourself? What tools can you put in your self care tool box? Notice the things that bring you comfort, connectedness, joy, wellness in body, mind and heart. Can you put yourself in the way of those things? How? What things in your life are taking more than they are giving? How can you put boundaries around those things? Notice what you say yes to. Notice what you say no to. Notice as an observer, an inner compassionate witness and see how gentle you can be with yourself.
MANIFESTO: THE MAD FARMER LIBERATION FRONT
~ by Wendell Berry
Love the quick profit,
the annual raise,
vacation with pay.
Want more of everything ready-made.
Be afraid to know your neighbors and to die.
And you will have a window in your head.
Not even your future will be a mystery any more.
Your mind will be punched in a card and shut away in a little drawer.
When they want you to buy something they will call you.
When they want you to die for profit they will let you know.
So, friends, every day do something that won't compute.
Love the Lord.
Love the world.
Work for nothing.
Take all that you have and be poor.
Love someone who does not deserve it.
Denounce the government and embrace the flag.
Hope to live in that free republic for which it stands.
Give your approval to all you cannot understand.
Praise ignorance, for what man has not encountered he has not destroyed.
Ask the questions that have no answers.
Invest in the millennium.
Plant sequoias.
Say that your main crop is the forest that you did not plant,
that you will not live to harvest.
Say that the leaves are harvested when they have rotted into the mold.
Call that profit.
Prophesy such returns.
Put your faith in the two inches of humus that will build under the trees every thousand years.
Listen to carrion--put your ear close, and hear the faint chattering of the songs that are to come.
Expect the end of the world.
Laugh.
Laughter is immeasurable.
Be joyful though you have considered all the facts.
So long as women do not go cheap for power, please women more than men.
Ask yourself: Will this satisfy a woman satisfied to bear a child?
Will this disturb the sleep of a woman near to giving birth?
Go with your love to the fields.
Lie easy in the shade.
Rest your head in her lap.
Swear allegiance to what is nighest your thoughts.
As soon as the generals and the politicos can predict the motions of your mind, lose it.
Leave it as a sign to mark a false trail, the way you didn't go.
Be like the fox who makes more tracks than necessary, some in the wrong direction.
Practice resurrection.